


Nightlight

by HeavenKnowsImMiserable



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Ben Parker and his lessons, Ben Parker is a good dad, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Peter Parker Gets a Hug, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is Trying His Best, Precious Peter Parker, The MCU won't acknowledge Ben but I will
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:46:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24952528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavenKnowsImMiserable/pseuds/HeavenKnowsImMiserable
Summary: “Being afraid of the dark is normal.” The answer wasn’t surprising in the least. Uncle Ben looked like he could tackle a gorilla without breaking a sweat. He was a marshmallow on the inside though; all sweet and gooey. He could play catch with you in the park one minute and then sob loudly at the end of Return of the Jedi the next. So, Uncle Ben didn’t tell him to ‘man up’ or ‘grow a pair’.“I read it’s the lack of any visual stimuli that freaks me out.”“Is that why you’re running up my electricity bill, Petey?” Ben raised a knowing brow.(Or, Ben Parker teaches Peter that he is never alone. It is a hard lesson to remember.)
Relationships: Ben Parker & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 4
Kudos: 28





	Nightlight

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this mess of grammar and all-consuming sadness! I wrote this right after seeing Endgame a year ago. Needless to say, I was a little distraught. Enjoy!

When Peter was nine, he was afraid of the dark. After at least a month of sleepless nights, Ben sat him down to have a conversation. Parker to Parker. 

“I feel like a huge wimp.”

“Being afraid of the dark is normal.” The answer wasn’t surprising in the least. Uncle Ben looked like he could tackle a gorilla without breaking a sweat. He was a marshmallow on the inside though; all sweet and gooey. He could play catch with you in the park one minute and then sob loudly at the end of Return of the Jedi the next. So, Uncle Ben didn’t tell him to ‘man up’ or ‘grow a pair’.

“I read it’s the lack of any visual stimuli that freaks me out.”

“Is that why you’re running up my electricity bill, Petey?” Ben raised a knowing brow. 

“No, it’s just,” Peter flushed, “I keep thinking about how when the lights go out, when I wake up, there might not be anybody to turn the lights back on again,” His voice turned husky and hushed until no sound came out at all. 

“Peter, you know we’re never going to leave you, right?” Ben spoke just as quietly, sliding closer to him on the snot coloured sofa. The springs groaned under his weight but supported him nonetheless. 

“Yeah I know, but sometimes you don’t have that choice. You told me that.”

“And I wasn’t lying, Peter. Just because your parents aren’t here doesn’t mean they aren’t with you. They loved you so much, you’ll always have that.”

He ruffled the mop of curls on his nephew’s head, sending Peter’s glasses askew. Peter pouted and went to realign the oversized frames. In retaliation, Peter crawled on top of Ben’s shoulders to push the beanie over his eyes. “Hey! I thought you were afraid of heights, you gremlin!”

“You’re not that tall, Ben. You’re just a short hipster.”

“Oh my god, this is what happens when you raise a genius. They sass you.” He grumbled as he rolled the fabric out of his eyes with his palms. 

“I didn’t sass!”

“You know what happens to sassy geniuses?” Ben grinned and stood up to his full height. Peter shrieked, scrabbling to gain purchase on his uncle's shoulders. “Their egos get squashed by my wisdom and 5’8 stature.”

“Okay! You win! You win! You’re so tall! You’re taller than the fudging empire state building!” 

“Yeah, thanks, Peter. You’re right I am tall.” Ben flopped down graciously and spread his arms along the back of the couch. Deflated, Peter slid off Ben’s shoulders, at once amused and out of breath. Once his feet hit the solid and familiar squish of cotton, he fell onto Ben’s lap, panting wildly. “Do you need your puffer, Pete?” 

“Nah, Nah, I’m cool.” 

“Hi cool, I’m Ben.” Peter punched Ben’s arm and they fell into a fit of ceaseless giggles. Once the laughter settled into the occasional huff of breath, a comfortable silence settled between them. “Are you still afraid of the dark?” Ben asked quietly.

“I dunno. It’s still scary to think about, but I feel better.” Peter replied as he went to sit straighter on Ben’s knees. 

“Well tough guy, me and May splurged a little this month and well… Close your eyes.” Peter complied and clamped his eyes shut until he felt the familiar callouses that littered Ben’s work-worn fingers pry his fist open. With a gentleness that only his uncle could possess, a small metal object pressed into his palm. Peter’s eyes snapped open. Peter held an arc reactor in his hands. “It’s a nightlight.” Ben tilted his head to the side sheepishly, “This way, even if the lights go out, Pete, it will always be there.”

“Thanks, Ben.” Peter croaked, eyes wet. “It’s awesome.” He rocked forward onto his heels, the reactor clasped tightly in one hand and the other wrapped around his uncle’s neck. A warm hand fell onto his back and squeezed lightly. 

“Anytime, Peter.” 

xxx

Peter is sixteen years old when he remembers what it feels like to be scared of the dark. He sits on a battlefield, drowning in ash and blood. Warriors kneel and acknowledge the sacrifice that gave the universe a chance of redemption. He watches the arc reactor that saved him from suffocating in the cloying, inky blackness for so many years, flicker out of existence. A heartbeat goes along with it. 

The light does not turn back on and he is alone.

**Author's Note:**

> *TASM Lizard voice* pOor pEta pAKa*


End file.
